A Few Catly Ideas About Life
Well finally!! It's been quite awhile since I have been able to wrestle....errr.....ask politely for use of the computer from Fur Mama. You know how much she loves her blog! From morning to night she's either typing on the computer, or planning a post or checking emails for comments. A cat can't hardly get a chance to surf the web, if you know what I mean! But, I finally was able to use my "poor kitty" look to get my paws on the mouse again! And just in the nick of time, because I have a lot I want to get off of my furry chest.
Funny, my paws are moving a little slow these days. Frankly, I've been a bit under the weather lately. My mouth feels funny and...well, this is a bit embarrassing....but I haven't been able to keep up with my catly hygiene in the manner to which I have become accustomed these last 16 1/2 years. Hygiene is something I feel quite strongly about. Have you ever been around a smelly human? Pee----yew!!! How hard can it be to lick yourself about 150 times so you don't smell bad?! But, that's just the point. Lately, I can't seem to get my tongue to work quite right. It's upsetting I can tell you. And, I want to sleep a lot. Y--a--w--n-- I can't believe how tired I am these days. I just want to sleep and sleep and sleep....when I'm not working as an Ace Cat Reporter, of course!
I'm worried about Fur Mama and Fur Papa. They seem to go around feeling sad all the time. Cats can sense these things, you know. We are highly tuned to human emotion. Fur Mama insisted (against my better judgment, mind you) on putting me into that plastic cage contraption and dragging me to that smelly, noisy place I hate. I hear all sorts of other cats meowing and the dogs....oh that place reeks of dogs... and their barking hurts my ears! But, the worse part is that man that always has to pick me up and poke and prod at me. I do not like him one bit! And he said something that upset Fur Mama. And while he was saying it he was prying my mouth open to show my mouth to Fur Mama. And then Fur Mama began to look sad. She tried to hide it, but I am a cat and I know these things. I could feel her upset and...well, she hasn't really been the same since. I tried to help her feel better by not meowing as loudly going back home as I had meowed going. But, it didn't seem to help much. A part of me wants to bite that man for making Fur Mama sad....but, I know I should turn the other whisker whenever possible and keep my paws...and fangs...to myself.
I wonder what has made her and Fur Papa sad? And they have been giving me the strangest food! Tuna and chicken all smashed up with liquid on it that smells like either chicken or clams. I do my best to lap it ....but my mouth....it's hard to make my tongue work right. Strange.....
Since I have so many cat naps these days, I have been having numerous dreams about my sister, Groucho. You know she came up missing, right? It is a mystery that I haven't been able to solve yet, even as great of an Ace Cat Reporter as I am. One day she was here, then she wasn't, and I haven't been able to find her. Fur Mama and Fur Papa looked very sad when this all happened, also. Hmmm....I just thought of that. Very similar to how they are acting now.
I go upstairs and downstairs on a daily basis meowing for her. I can still smell her scent on the corners so she must be around somewhere....but where? She was always good to touch noses with me when I was frightened, and, well, I'm feeling a bit frightened lately what with my tongue acting so strangely and all. Perhaps that's why I dreamed of her. In my last dream she was lying in a beautiful green field with lots of other cats. The sun was shining down on her and warming her sleek, black fur. There were sweet smelling flowers growing next to a stream and I do believe there were even dogs nearby....but the cats didn't seem to mind. Groucho seemed to be calling to me, meowing to me to come be with her. Did you know that cats could dream? In another dream I had, Groucho was more of a shadowy figure in the background next to the stream. But, get this....the cat who was meowing to me to come was my arch nemesis also known as my Cousin Annie! Why on earth would she be meowing for me to come be with her?! We were sworn cat enemies you know!
Oh yes, I remember the days when she made my life, and Groucho's, a living he......well, let's just say she made our life "unpleasant" and leave it at that, shall we? It all started so innocently at first. Grandma Nana would go out of town and Cousin Annie would come to our territory for a few days to stay. Fur Mama called it "Cat Sitting" of all things. How silly! Why would a cat need to be sat on? This happened quite a few times, this cat sitting business. (Although, I never witnessed Fur Mama actually sitting on Annie. It was quite the opposite. Cousin Annie would sit on Fur Mama and get petted.....I ask you!) But then, one day, Cousin Annie came and NEVER LEFT! Oh it was a time of sore trial, my friends. You see, Cousin Annie thought she knew EVERYTHING about our territory and she proceeded to swiftly take over. Or....at least she TRIED to take over. But, oh Groucho and I were equally swift to put her in her place, I tell you that! My friends, the fur would fly some days. First, she demurred to sleep on the dresser like a proper cat OUTSIDE of her territory should, leaving Groucho and I to our well deserved places between Fur Mama and Fur Papa. But, then...she started sleeping on the bookcase next to the family bed and THEN...plopped her paws right on the bed next to Fur Mama! I saw her beady eyes looking greedily at the family bed from the first day she came. Who did she think she was, anyway? And worst of all, friends.....well, I am hesitant to say this....actually a bit embarrassed at this point over the whole thing.....but, well, I may as well come out and say it. Cousin Annie was......orange! There, I said it, yes, I admit that I was prejudice against her fur color. And envious of the fact that she got so much attention from the Fur Humans....especially Fur Mama.
Y-A-W-N.....oh, here I go getting sleepy again. Must be time for another cat nap. I have a few more things I want to say, though, before my big sleep comes and I may only have a few more minutes before Fur Mama takes back her computer so I had best complete this post. Hmmmm...big sleep....those words seem a bit poignant today. In fact, everything about life seems poignant now. I've even begun thinking of Cousin Annie a bit differently...somehow the fur on my neck doesn't stand up when I think of her the way it used to....before.....
You know, she came up missing, also. What is it about cats coming up missing in this territory? Like Groucho, I still catch a scent of Cousin Annie from time to time and I actually admit that....well...that I kind of miss the scraps we used to get into. She wasn't so bad, I guess. She may have been orange and bossy, but she had four paws and a tail just like Groucho and me. And she acted a little kinder to me once Groucho went missing. She would even sometimes curl up on the bed close to me sometimes. She seemed to sleep a lot, too, before she went missing, just like I am doing now. And a few times, she would awaken from a cat nap and tell me about strange dreams she had...of seeing Groucho next to a stream meowing to her to come. I didn't really understand it at the time, but....now.....I wonder.....
A cat's life is not an easy one, my friends. Even when a cat is loved and petted on by their fur humans. Groucho and I were lucky to be brought home by Fur Mama and Fur Papa and not left to fend for ourselves like we had to in our earliest days. We were just kittens when we picked out our humans. They have shown me love and I have done my best to teach them what they should learn from me. It is the duty of every cat to do this, even though humans can be stubborn and willful and want their own way rather than doing what is best. But, cats understand this. We are infinitely patient and willing to wait, if need be, until our humans get the point. I heard Fur Papa tell Fur Mama once that "animals have a direct line to God." I am glad that he knows this, for I have known this from kittenhood. That is why, although I am puzzled and uncertain by not knowing exactly where Groucho and, even Annie, are, I know that they are safe. For God loves and takes care of all of His creatures. Of that I am certain.....Perhaps my humans knowing this means that I have completed my teaching of them. Mission accomplished.
I end this post with what I will call my "pithy cat commentary" on life......don't let the hairballs in life get you down.
OK, Fur Mama....I'm done with my post....no, here, I want you to take the computer back....I think I'm ready for my big sleep....
Gracie, Ace Cat Reporter